Tag Archives: god

083 – Kent Hovind, Radiometric Dating, and Other Stuff WITH CASH!

Atheist on Air 083 Kent Hovind, Radiometric Dating, and Other Stuff WITH CASH!

With:
Skeptic Cash!
Professor Stephen
Rachel Nanon Brown
Jason Comeau
and
Andrew Jennings

Cash comes back for a great show, opening with a rant and ending with love all around. The topics range from what a dick the pope is, to how creationists are wrong about radiometric dating. The discussion flows from backward christian bullshit about the moon landing, to mormon revisionism, to christian misogyny, to how christian women worshiping sexy Jesus is creepy, to creationist dishonesty, and beyond. And on top of all of this, Rachel, Professor Stephen, Andrew and Cash lay in to that blathering blatherskite, Kent Hovand. What an ass.

It’s like an AoA family reunion… only it doesn’t suck!

God’s Survey

[submitted by listener: Pariah Exile]  Thank you!

Ya know those survey forms they have tucked into everything you buy now-a-days ? I hate those damn things. There was one of those survey cards sitting on the desk. One thing lead to another; this is the result, which ensures my place in Hell. This is ancient, but I am still fairly pleased with it.

 

To Better Serve You: God would like you to fill out the following:

                              

God would like to thank you for your belief and patronage. In order to better serve your needs, God asks that you take a few moments to answer the following questions.

 

Please keep in mind that your responses will be kept completely confidential, and that you need not disclose your name or address unless you prefer a direct response to comments or suggestions.

 

1. How did you find out about your deity?

Newspaper

Bible

Torah

Television

Book of Mormon

Divine Inspiration

Dead Sea Scrolls

My Mama Done Tol’ Me

Near Death Experience

Near Life Experience

National Public Radio

Tabloid

Burning Shrubbery

Other

 

2. Which model deity did you acquire?

Yahweh

Father, Son & Holy Ghost [Trinity Pack]

Jehovah

Jesus

Krishna

Zeus and entourage [Olympus Pack]

Odin and entourage [Valhalla Pack]

Allah

Satan

Gia/Mother Earth/Mother Nature

Custom Blend [ with/without options]

None of the above, I was taken in by a false god

 

3. Did your God come to you undamaged, with all parts in good working order and with no obvious breakage or missing attributes?

Yes

No

 

If no, please describe the problems you initially encountered here. Please indicate all that apply:

Not eternal

Finite in space/Does not occupy or inhabit the entire cosmos

Not omniscient

Not omnipotent

Not infinitely plastic (incapable of being all things to all creations)

Permits sex outside of marriage

Prohibits sex outside of marriage

Makes mistakes (Jeffery Dahmer; televangilists,George Bush Jr)

Makes or permits bad things to happen to good people

When beseeched, does not stay beseeched

Requires burnt offerings

Requires virgin sacrifices

 

4. What factors were relevant in your decision to acquire a deity? Please check all

that apply.

 

Indoctrinated by parents

Needed a reason to live

Indoctrinated by society

Needed focus whom to despise

Imaginary friend grew up

Wanted to know Jesus in the Biblical sense

Hate to think for myself

Wanted to meet girls/boys

Fear of death

Wanted to piss off parents

Needed a day away from work

Desperate need for certainty

Like organ music

Need to feel morally superior

Thought Jerry Falwell was cool

Strange Stuff was falling out of the sky

My shrubbery caught fire and a loud voice commanded me to do it

 

5. Have you ever worshipped a deity before? If so, which false god were you fooled by? Please check all that apply.

Mick Jagger

Cthulhu

Baal

The Almighty Dollar

Bill Gates

Left-Wing Liberalism

The Radical Right

Ra

Beelzebub

Barney

The Great Spirit

The Great Pumpkin

The Sun

Elvis

Cindy Crawford

The Moon

Burning Shrubbery

Television

Other

 

6. Are you currently using any other source of inspiration in addition to God?

Please check all that apply.

 

Tarot

Lottery

Astrology

Television

Fortune cookies

Ann Landers

Psychic Friends Network

Dianetics

Palmistry

Playboy and/or Playgirl

Self-help books

Sex, Drugs, Rock and Roll

Biorhythms

Alcohol

Bill Clinton

Tea Leaves

EST

The Internet

Mantras

Jimmy Swaggert

Crystals

Human Sacrifice

Pyramids

Wandering Around a Desert

Insurance Policies

Burning Shrubbery

Barney

Pokemon

Other

None

 

7. God employs a limited degree of Divine Intervention to preserve the balanced level

of felt presence and blind faith.

 

Which would you prefer (select one)?

a. More Divine Intervention

b. Less Divine Intervention

c. Current level of Divine Intervention is just right

d. Don’t know…what’s Divine Intervention?

 

8. God also attempts to maintain a balanced level of disasters and miracles.

 

Please rate on a scale of 1 – 5 his handling of the following:

(1 = unsatisfactory, 5 = excellent):

 

A.  Disasters:

Flood: 1 2 3 4 5

Famine: 1 2 3 4 5

Earthquake: 1 2 3 4 5

War: 1 2 3 4 5

Pestilence: 1 2 3 4 5

Plague: 1 2 3 4 5

SPAM: 1 2 3 4 5

AOL: 1 2 3 4 5

Ken Starr: 1 2 3 4 5

 

B.  Miracles:

Rescues: 1 2 3 4 5

Spontaneous remissions: 1 2 3 4 5

Stars hovering over jerkwater towns: 1 2 3 4 5

Crying statues: 1 2 3 4 5

Water changing to wine: 1 2 3 4 5

Walking on water: 1 2 3 4 5

VCRs that set their own clocks: 1 2 3 4 5

Saddam Hussein still alive: 1 2 3 4 5

Getting any sex whatsoever: 1 2 3 4 5

 

 

9. Do you have any additional comments or suggestions for improving the quality of God’s services?

 

                              

 

If you are able to complete the questionnaire and return it to one of our conveniently located service centers by December 30, you will be entered in the One Free Miracle of Your Choice drawing (chances of winning are approximately one in 9.07251 x 10 to the 23rd power, depending on number of beings entered).

 

 

Thank You,

 

Big G

036 – Dr. Darrel Ray – Sex & God

If you’ve been following the Sexipisodes then you know what God has to say about sex.  Tonight we have the Guru, Dr. Ray on and we discuss the power of shame and guilt amongst religions.  We discuss the evolution of the genitals and the distortions made by religion.

Have you ever taken a good long look at your sexuality, your views on sex and your sexual ideologies?  Have you ever reviewed what you consider moral and why?

Get Darrel’s books:

The God Virus Sex & God

A huge thanks to Darrel for spending nearly 3 hours with us.  This was better than having Jesus on the show.  We gave away some books, we talked with callers and challenged our views.

Dr. Ray’s current projects include the Recovering From Religion website and the Secular Therapy Project.  You can support their efforts by donating at either site or sharing with friends.  Consider starting a Recovering From Religion group in your area.  You’ll be amazed at how many people benefit from having others to help them through the process.